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Better Living Through Better Questions

January 20, 2019 By Julian Kaufmann

Want better answers? Ask better questions

Asking to connect with your spiritual self

Part of our re-birth and awakening is to return to our true nature and to no longer be identified with the external world.

We come into the world innocent and then are influenced by our family of origin and other circumstances. As we grow and mature, we want to fit in, to belong, and we want to make sense of things. We internalize and adopt certain concepts and conventions about the world as we know it. We ask questions – whether internal or external and begin to construct the mental models that can become more rigid over time. But the only constant in life is change, and fixed-mindset can reinforce our ego and its limited perception of the world. Our neurons fire and wire together providing us with a simplified approximation of the way the world works along with a reinforcing notion that we need to be fixed or that we need something in order to be complete. And until we are liberated with the ultimate truth of reality (we are spiritual beings having a physical experience), our ego mind entraps us through judgments and labels.

Don’t get me wrong, I have a profound appreciation of our ego minds and what they do for us. After all, we can’t spend our days living in continual spiritual unity bliss (sitting for 40-days under a tree, for example, will likely cause you to be evicted from your apartment for not paying the rent). We have to take care of our needs, our family, and our tribe. But while the mind is a wonderful servant it is a terrible master. We can work with our mind, training it to help us arrive back in our spiritual truth.

Our mind needs a problem to solve, a way to channel its cognitive capabilities. One of the best ways to practice spiritual judo on your mind is to ask it some deeper questions and allow the answers to come to you.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity.” – Albert Einstein

Ask and you shall receive

Of course we may never really be able to answer for ourselves the ultimate questions of why we are here and what is the meaning of life. Rather than getting stuck on pondering the ultimate question, I would recommend starting with some “easier” questions.

One of the reasons that meditation and contemplation is so helpful is that the monkey mind can calm down during these practices. We become less reactive and more reflective. As we move from living in our heads to living in our spiritual hearts our true gifts can unfold and be shared with the world. The Truth will set us free!

The bible instructs us that the kingdom of heaven is available to us and that all we have to do is knock and doors will open. If only it were this simple, right? We are told to ask for what we want and it will be given to us. So we do as we are told. We ask and more often than not our prayers go answered. If you are like me, maybe you felt that these unanswered prayers were a result of you not being worthy. Many of us will ask our higher power, God, Jesus, whatever name we give to grant us our wish, to give us the thing we are praying for. One problem might be our state of alignment with our higher power. Maybe we are not asking the right questions and praying the “right” prayers and as a result our desired manifestations are left out. Instead of asking for circumstances that are in resonance with the universal field of consciousness we may instead be focused on lower, more base desires and wants. Our Ego is doing the talking and the asking while the true essence of who we are may lie dormant or crowded out by all the material concerns that impact us.

We might evolve from a sense of separateness from the Divine Source and instead recognize that we are one and are in fact God manifest through us as us. After all we are the ocean in the wave to paraphrase Alan Watts. From this awareness of our higher-selves, we may invoke New Thought principles and use affirmative prayer. This type of positive prayer has you declare a desired outcome, rather than asking for it, and like magic you materialize the manifestation you have held. The thoughts you have held in your mind have produced their own kind. For example, you affirm, “I attract loving , supporting people into my life”, and like magic you meet your new best friend or at long-last your desire for a romantic partner is fulfilled.

The problem with both the beseeching and affirmative prayer is that our mind and hence our perspective may have us asking for the wrong things or affirming things that are not in alignment with our higher selves. Also we may be unduly influenced by our body and its instinctive drives and desires. If our bodies are off, we may be focused on alleviating symptoms of disease and not able to comprehend the nature of the actual cause. We may be fearful and focus our prayers and affirmations on lower order manifestations, forgoing the more fulfilling possibilities that are available to us. Like Socrates instructed an unexamined life is not worth living and that we should know ourselves. This is where meditation has been very helpful for me as it cultivates an awareness into my thoughts, my fears and my desires. Again prayer is talking to God while meditation is listening.

By reflecting on our lives we can discover who we are. We can make sense of our true essence and live more authentically and with more presence. There are several profound questions that help guide you towards a true recognition of who you are.

Who am I and who is having this experience?

This is a deceptively simple question with profound results if you practice it and listen for the answers. For example, suppose you are married and your first answer to the question may be that you are a husband. Ok but who is having the experience of being a husband? After all, you may not remain married, maybe you get divorced. Regardless of the dissolution of the marriage, you or rather the awareness of you remains. Keep asking who you are until you reach the ineffable unity realization. There is something deeper to us than the labels we give to describe the material world around us. If you are identified with external labels and constructs, please send time peeling back the onion to discover who you really are. As you do this exercise, be gentle with your self. It was helpful to view myself literally as a child of God. As a parent, I tried to offer my children patience and unconditional love. When they would ask questions about the world I would do my best to answer and to encourage them to learn and experience the world for themselves. A loving God would do the same for you too! Ask who you are and eventually you receive the ultimate answer – that we are all one and part of the universe.

What makes you come alive?

Howard Thurman said “Ask what makes you come alive and go do it, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” We are naturally inquisitive and have instincts that propel us to explore our world and try new things. By centering ourselves through introspection and awareness we will feel small urges that will nudge us towards those things that make us feel alive. Perhaps like me, you will get an urge to write a book. Maybe you will want to play the guitar or take up acting. You may feel compelled to get involved with local outreach groups that are serving your community. You feel the calling to explore to produce to create. Whatever the urges, you allow the spark to develop into a flame of initiative and then you do the next step and take action towards your dream. You go do it. You begin to manifest the dream. And once you start taking steps towards your dream, as Paulo Coelho says “the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” You know you are on to something when you lose track of time and you lose your sense of self. You flow with the activity. You and your work become one.

If money were no object what would you do?

As we get fixated on achieving external goals we may become disconnected from our natural inclinations and latent talents. Ask what would you do if you did not need to make money and follow the answers. At first you may fantasize about winning the lottery and living a decadent, lavish life. Go ahead and indulge that scenario for a while. No matter what you buy, there will always be something newer and better to take its place. The hedonic treadmill offers the siren call of pleasure but in the end only prolongs suffering. Ask yourself the question and allow the answer to come to you. Follow the lead, follow your bliss.

What would Jesus do?

Some Christians take this question to be an organizing principle for how they should live their life. Whenever they are confronted by a vexing circumstance or choice, the answer to “What would Jesus do?”, provides guidance and direction to their life. By having the Messiah as their mentor, they are led by their own Christ conscience in their action and deed. Acting as if – in this case acting as if Christ – aligns a person with their higher self. Jesus’s two commandments were: 1) to love your God and 2) to love your neighbor as your self. Being mindful of these instructions will further align you with the Divine as you consider your next action.

Other way showers in the major world religions can provide spiritual counsel to help you navigate life on this mortal plane. Get help wherever and from whomever you need.

Being present, being in the here and now fully, is the cornerstone of optimal experience. I have been studying and practicing ways to encourage more presence in my life – body, mind, and spirit. My next book The Power of Presence – How To Amp-Up Your Life provides a how-to-guide on showing up at your best. If you would like to be part of the Prime Mover Team and get early, free access to the book and related resources before it is released, please sign up here.

Julian Kaufmann is an energy expert, entrepreneur, and author. Julian helps people get more out of life by applying science and universal spiritual truths to get more done by using less energy. Julian is here to help turn you on, more brightly, and help you share your light with the world.

Filed Under: Presence Tagged With: answers, Questions, truth

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