Julian Kaufmann

EMPOWERING PEOPLE TO LIVE AND LOVE, FULLY

Affirming Affirmations

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Ok. I have a confession.

Until recently I was not a fan of affirmations because they just did not work for me. Intellectually I understood their importance, but for whatever reason, I could not actually relate to any phrases I ran across. I could never find the right words that resonated with me.

Over the years I read scores of books and consulted many online resources all extolling the virtues of utilizing affirmations as a way to accomplish your goals. The Power of Positive Thinking, Think and Grow Rich, As Man Thinketh are a few of the many books I devoured.

After reading Hal Erod’s Miracle Morning book, I have applied Elrod’s S.A.V.E.R.S. routine, save for one aspect, as my own, enjoying its benefits. In case you are not familiar with the S.A.V.E.R.S. acronym, here its is spelled out along with my comments on each facet:

  • Silence – Silence or meditation. This was pretty easy for me to incorporate since I have been gradually building up a daily meditation practice over the years.
  • Affirmations – This is where I struggled and will comment more about this later.
  • Visualization – While a new practice for me this aspect seemed very easy and enjoyable. I am blessed with a vivid imagination and could easily get into the future visions of the world that I wanted to create.
  • Exercise -Daily exercise has been a part of my routine for many years now, so this was already in the bag for me.
  • Reading – I commit to reading some type of spiritual text each day and enjoy the centering feeling of connecting with God first thing to start the day. Like exercise, this was already part of my morning routine.
  • Scribing – While I don’t yet journal in the morning. I do utilize the 5-Minute Journal App to record at least 3-things that I am grateful for each day. Also included in the app is a place for me to write an affirmation. which brings us back to the “A” – affirmations.

So the missing Affirmation piece continued to evade me. I was practicing the SVERS routine.

I searched in vain for inspiration and relatable resolutions. I would go online and copy other’s words hoping to find something that would work for me. For a recent example, see HuffPost’s  35 Affirmations That Will Change Your Life by Dr. Carmen Harra which offered the following affirmations:

  1. I am the architect of my life; I build its foundation and choose its contents.
  2. Today, I am brimming with energy and overflowing with joy.
  3. My body is healthy; my mind is brilliant; my soul is tranquil.
  4. I am superior to negative thoughts and low actions.
  5. I have been given endless talents which I begin to utilize today.
  6. …

Stopping a negative thought is better than not, but it is not the same as promoting a positive thought. 

I think in some way I was turned off by my perception of the pseudoscience of affirmations without any direct first-hand experience.   Maybe SNL’s Stuart Smalley, played by Al Franken,  biased me against the self-help platitudes I associated with affirmations. Check out this vintage clip in which Michael Jordan is Smalley’s guest on “Daily Affirmation” to see what I mean.

 

When the Student is Ready, The Teacher will Appear!

If you are struggling with affirmations, Hal Erod has a great article in Entrepreneur magazine “Why Affirmations Have Failed You and 4 Steps to Change That” that might help you like it did me.

After releasing my need for the perfect affirmation my own words finally came to me. I now have my mantra.  I believe and can attest to my affirmation’s power.  The words are my own and here they are:

I am Power, On Purpose, Producing Prosperity.

 

If you already have affirmations that work for you, congratulations. Please let me know what they are and why they resonate with you. Meanwhile, if you are still searching for your mantra. Be patient and have faith.

If all else fails, Stuart Smalley’s “I‘m Good Enough, I’m Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me!” might just do the trick.

 

7-Minutes in Heaven – keys to the kingdom

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consciousness closet?

When you were a kid did you ever play the game 7-minutes in Heaven?

If you don’t know about the game it is one in which two people, in my day a boy and a girl, go into a closet and spend 7-minutes “getting to know each other.”

While the two of you were in the closet someone on the outside was a timekeeper and was responsible for letting you know when your time was up with your closet-mate and when it was time for you to leave.

The 7-minutes in the closet usually consisted of some heavy petting, kissing and hugging etc., at least that is the way we played it. Sometimes you might just talk with the other person if there was no chemistry or neither one had a strong enough urge to make the first move.

There was something very liberating about being confined in a dark closet for me back then. I was aware that I could not be seen so I was less self-conscious about how awkward I was actually feeling. Closing the closet door disconnected me from my ego and allowed me to be freer.

Speaking of closing doors and disconnecting from your ego, the Bible says:

But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen – Matthew 6:6

Prayer is a sacred time for connecting with God and I find shutting myself off from the outside world often facilitates it. When I pray I close the door to the outside world and find refuge in the stillness.

Unfortunately spending time alone with your thoughts in a quite place can be a scary thing for some of us. As a result many people try to distract themselves constantly to avoid their own closet of silence.

Like prayer, meditation encourages us to disconnect from the outside world and enter a place a peace.

Benefits of meditation [i]include:

  • Reducing Stress
  • Improving concentration
  • Encouraging a healthy lifestyle
  • Increasing self-awareness
  • Increasing happiness
  • Increasing acceptance
  • Slowing aging

I confess that meditation is a difficult practice for me but one that has improved the quality of my life. Currently I set a countdown timer for 7-minutes and let go of my thoughts and focus on my breath.

Hence the new adult version of the 7-minutes in heaven game is played whenever and wherever you can close the door to the outside world and instead spend some quality time with you and your thoughts.

Please try it out and let me know what you think. Also try out the METTA mediation technique for more of a group experience –  Metta Mondays

Meanwhile enjoy the silence!

[i] Holmes, Lindsay. “8 Ways Meditation Can Improve Your Life.” The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, n.d. Web. 21 Mar. 2016.

 

 

Metta Not Manic Mondays

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As we adjust to daylight savings time, this first Monday following the clock adjustment can be hard on us and those around us.  The case of the “Mondays” can be especially pronounced.

With that in mind, we can use the practice of metta mediation to lessen our potential suffering by instead cultivating awareness of ourselves and all living beings.

The following video provides additional information on the practice:

I apologize for the quality of the video and realize it is out of focus.

I decided to leave it in conveying the effect of being being bleary eyed which many of you might be.

The pictures and presentation can be downloaded by clicking below

Metta Pictures

Metta Presentation

If you would like to learn more about how to better manage your energy, please sign up for my free course – Flow 101

https://juliankaufmann.com/flow-landing-page1/

Namaste – Julian

 

 

Your Highest Potential

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It’s the most wonderful time of the year- Seasons greetings everyone. I hope that all is well with you, your family and loved ones.

The holidays and this time of year are very special to me. I enjoy the lights, the celebrations, the gatherings and the excess food, music, and giving of gifts. I also like the holidays because it is a time of reflection. During this time we slow down and have a chance to express gratitude for our blessings and share with our loved ones.

As the year draws to a close many people, including me, begin to formulate their New Year’s resolutions. After potentially excess celebrations over the holidays we may resolve to go on a diet and to maybe create a specific goal to lose 15 pounds by Valentines Day, just in time for the chocolates. We may want to save more money, spend less time on social media, volunteer more, etc.

Unfortunately despite our good intentions most people fail to keep their resolutions and according to the New York Times, 1/3rd of us can’t keep our resolutions past the end of January[i]. This might explain why the gym is so crowded in January and much less dense by March.

I recently read and highly recommend Gretchen Rubin’s book Better Than Before – Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives.

http://www.amazon.com/Better-Than-Before-Mastering-Everyday/dp/0385348614

In her book Rubin provides a framework for determining your habit style and why the one-size fits all goal setting does not work. Instead when we employ an individualized approach that works with our framework, we are much more likely to master our habits and create the change/life we want. Please let me know what you think of the book and if it is helpful to you.

Beyond mastering habits, I think it is first import to align yourself with your higher power. By connecting with God, we can create a purposeful vision to help guide us in expressing our full potential. It is important that our goals match the divine inclinations that are unique to each of us. Once we have established the “right” path, everything that follows, flows with ease and spontaneity.

And when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

– Paulo Coehlo, The Alchemist

The force that causes electricity to flow, voltage, is a relative measure of the difference in energy between two points. Accordingly Voltage is also known as electric potential difference. This difference in potential energy creates the force that causes the electrons to circulate.

By aiming our thoughts and goals to a higher level, similarly we create more energy for us to work with. So before compiling your list of resolutions first establish your connection with your highest power and observe the good works that will follow.

Wishing you peace and joy always.

[i] “Will Your Resolutions Last Until February?” Well Will Your Resolutions Last Until February Comments. New York Times, 31 Dec. 2007. Web. 29 Dec. 2015.

 

What Will Bowen taught me about the world’s largest ball of paint

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This weekend I was fortunate to meet and listen to Will Bowen, the best selling author most widely known for his Complaint Free World book and its accompanying challenge. The Complaint Free World challenge is to simply go 21-consecutive days without complaining. Sounds easy right? That is until you realize just how damn hard it is. (I just complained!)

As a queue to help you remember not to complain and to track your progress, Will includes purple rubber bracelets you wear daily on your wrist. Whenever you complain you switch the bracelet to the other wrist and reset your clock. Day 1 begins each time you switch wrists. This process repeats until you go 21-days without complaining, thus keeping the bracelet on the same wrist for that length of time.

Bowen says it can take between 4-8 months to make actually make it through 21- no complaint days. What makes the challenge difficult is that we often do not even realize how habitual our complaining is, so the first step is to become aware of our thoughts and then we can make adjustments. Bowen went on to stress that life unfolds day by day and is cumulative. That is, the little things we do each day add up to determine the body of work we create.

This is where the world’s largest ball of paint comes in.

Bowen shared the story of how he and his daughter went on vacation touring obscure sites throughout the Midwest. Part of their journey brought them to Alexandria, Indiana, which is home to a giant ball of paint that is over 14 feet in circumference and weighs over 2.5 tons.

What is remarkable is this present day paint planet started out as an ordinary baseball, which has a circumference of 9-9.25 inches and weighs between 5-5.25 ounces. (32,000 ounces is equal to 1-ton) Each day since January 1, 1977 the ball’s owner has had a single layer of paint applied on it. According to the Dampney Engineered coatings company, a single coat of paint has a theoretical thickness of 1 mil (.001inch). So for the past 14,123 days the ball has been growing through having a fresh coat of paint applied to it. While each day the addition of a new coat may not seem to be much, over time this cumulative addition is quite profound.

As the saying goes “Rome was not built in a day.”

Now back to what we are building each day with our lives.

Eliminating complaining for 21-days is a challenging experiment, but one that can dramatically improve your life and the lives of those around you. Imagine what we could build with our lives if we kept complaint free for our remaining days.

Links

A Complaint Free World http://www.acomplaintfreeworld.org/

World’s Largest Ball of Paint http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/9792

Baseball (ball) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baseball_(ball)